COMMENT | Patient: Thor Kah Hoong

Diagnosis on admission: The patient displayed classic symptoms of paranoia, ie anxious, fearful thoughts and feelings about threats and a conspiracy, intense suspicion of hidden motives giving rise to a sense of anger and betrayal.

Transcript of the session with patient:

Doctor: Mr Thor, what are you afraid of?

Thor: A plague of slimy, disease-riddled frogs. I have been having nightmares about them.

Doctor: Frogs?

Thor: Yes, frogs.

Doctor: Kermit?

Thor: A hand-puppet, a cartoon, only good for laughs. The real thing is no laughing matter.

Doctor: Why are you afraid of frogs? Was there a childhood trauma involving them?

Thor: As a child, I used to catch tadpoles and put them in jars. Tadpoles are cute. They look like little fishes. But after a few weeks, they grew webbed limbs and couldn’t be confined in jars anymore. That’s the problem with them – you can’t pin them down in one spot. They get bloated and keep hopping to where there is better feed.

For decades the species has been infesting the political landscape. In earlier years, there were only a few in peninsula Malaysia, though the problem was quite bad in East Malaysia. Now, in recent months, the numbers have exploded in West Malaysia after May 9.

Doctor: But political leaders have said there will be a team of vets checking to make sure they are clean and will not muddy the gene pool. The mutated horrors will not be allowed in from the political wilderness.

Thor: (Laughs) Am I the one who is supposed to have a mental problem, or is it you? You believe politicians?...