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The times I used to frequent the mosque
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There was a time when I frequented the mosque. Some of my best epiphanies happened when I was in the mosque, as I like to observe my surroundings and the mosque is often a quiet place to think.

Though not the friendliest of places for women, I frequented the mosque anyway, especially when the mosque is empty.

Growing up, Muslim girls are not encouraged to go to the mosque. It is said that it is better for us to pray at home, where we do not become distractions for the men praying at the mosque. Whereas men are more than encouraged to go, making the mosque a very male-dominated space.

Prayer space for women is often much smaller compared to men's. While the big mosques often have large spaces for women, the majority of mosques and surau (smaller Muslim prayer halls) dedicate very small portions of the compound for women. And the space for women is always at the back, never front or center.

I used to go to the mosque as much as I could, even though I avoid the peak, crowded hours. I went for many of the lectures to learn about my religion, until I grew tired of always having to listen from behind a curtain.

That was not the only thing I grew tired of. I also grew tired of the scarcity of women speakers at the mosque. It is always women who have to listen to men's lectures, but not the other way around. Topics on women also mostly revolve around being the ideal woman, according to the interpretation and standards of men, not from the perspectives of actual, real-life women...

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